Sunday, December 28, 2008

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Merry Christmas to All, and To All a Goodnight!

'Twas the night before Christmas

As Santa chewed on a Mento

The creatures were all stirring

When Jess, Maddie and Isaac

Took a plane to Sacramento

Monday, December 22, 2008

Debbie Downer Moment

Feel free to stop reading now. I'll never know.

Many of us here in Utah saw this accident in Provo Canyon on the news today.

And only a handful of you know that I lost my uncle in an accident in almost the exact same spot in 1990.

So I've been a little edgy today, anxious to know the identity of the teenagers involved in today's crash. I'm very relieved to know that none of them are students of mine.

But still very sad for their families.

My poor kids are going to be on the shortest leashes when they are teenagers. I don't want to live in fear, but every time they walk out the door, especially when they are in a car driven by a teen, I'm going to be a mess. Unfortunately I know of too many families whose lives have been turned upside down because of a tragic accident.

How are we going to get through it?

We're going to need to stock up on some sedatives, maybe?

A Snowy Question

Why, why, why, why are there snow plows driving up and down our streets not plowing?

White 'Pre' Christmas?'

How are you doin'?

How's your mom 'n 'em?

So. This could be a long day.

We're snowed in.

As in: missing Maddie's soccer game this morning.

As in: I have a lot more shopping to do and time is running out.

As in: boredom finally forced me to make that batch of fudge.

As in: the kids are bouncing off of the walls. And each other.

The only thing we have to look forward to is piano lessons. I assume the kids will still be able to walk across the street this afternoon.

Stay tuned.

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Here in Who-ville

Cindy Lou Who and The Grinch

Friday, December 19, 2008

Not How I Wanted to Kick Off Christmas Break

A moment of silence please...

I had to (gasp) cancel my hair appointment.

Time for the pity party. It might include fudge.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

An Apology

Dear Mr. Taco Bell Worker,

I'm sorry that I was rude to you in the drive thru today, I've had guilt ever since.

But it was pretty frustrating to sit. And wait. And wait more, knowing full well that my little bag of food was to the right of the register, and you were just oblivious.

Then you came to the window and tried to collect from me again, this time for the order behind me, and even after I told you that I had ordered one crunchy taco and one burrito supreme, you looked at your screen and tried to convince me that my order was some random combo meal.

So, how surprised can you be that I blurted out "I've already paid!"?

And then you lamely replied "oh, I found your ticket".

No you didn't! You didn't find my ticket! You found my bag of food!

Now I partly blame myself, because I should have been smarter than to go to your Taco Bell. It's always full of morons. But Utah seems to have some ordinance against your establishment, banning franchises from being within 10 miles of on another, forcing me to return to you and yours.

Suggestion: try showing up to work not stoned.

Sincerely,

Me

ps You screwed up my order

(yes, you guessed it. it was the one at 123rd. and Redwood Rd.)

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Humble Pie

You probably know by now: I think that I'm a culinary genius.

Tonight I've had some humbling. Let's just say that it involves condensed milk and evaporated milk.

Not the same thing.

Stuck in the Snow Without a Paddle

Just in case you're keeping score on the Tug-of-War on my heart - point: California.

Snow.

Snow. Snow. Snow. Snow. Snow.

(no, that's not a request)

And, as it turns out, and with this being the first Big snow in this house: our driveway sucks! My car is down at the street. Even after shoveling, I can't get my car up the hill and around the bend.

Sounds like I've got a beautiful, long driveway, doesn't it?

Nope. Probably the same size as yours.

I had WAY too much to do Out In The World today. Out where the roads may or may not be plowed.

Ugh.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

M&Ms in the Snow

I used to think that my family owned the copyright on traditions. (hello! Pomegranate Weekend dates back to 1972!)

About five years ago, our (then) ward held an Enrichment Night in which several sisters shared their families' Christmas tradition.

Since then I've been collecting them in my heart. (yes, I'm well aware that I'm impossibly cheesy)

I learned about a family that gathers at one sibling's house for chili before going caroling. Good plan: let's send everyone outdoors after gassing up.

Another family snacks on M&Ms while picking out their Christmas tree in the forest. This tradition began when the mom and dad had to follow a trail of M&Ms in the snow to find their first toddler when they lost her in the trees. M&Ms have been included every year since.

Tiercy's family has a picnic dinner by the tree the night they put it up.

Isaac got to tag along with another family tonight whose advent calendar isn't full of waxy chocolate, rather fun notes with things to do. Tonight's note entitled one to pick up a buddy and go to the gas station for a candy bar. (where else would you go in E.M. besides the gas station?) This tradition started when their mom was a little girl.

In David's family, the girls all get new pajamas for Christmas. I think it's kind of spilled over to the boys now that Nana sews.

Speaking of David's family, each year Santa visits Grandma and Grampa's house, listening to all the grandkids' Christmas wishes.

My family? Like many others, we opened one gift on Christmas Eve. More recently a tradition has been established for some to take a trip on Christmas Day out to the gun club to try out the newest. No, I don't go, and it's getting harder and harder to make excuses for my kids to not go.

This might be a year for David, the kids and I to start some new traditions of our own. I'd love to hear about yours.

I'm Bugged

But it doesn't take much, does it?

I have been a huge fan for over a decade. (hard to believe that the show started 14 years ago)

I could go on and on about my devotion, but I think I'm done.

It's bad enough that she's dating a big ol' man whore.

Now this?

I guess it's her mid-life crisis.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Moving to PrimeTime

I wanted to offer a sincere congratulations to my BFF Jay Leno on his new show. What a comfort it is to know that during my sleepless nights, you'll just be downstairs waiting for me in the DVR.

Talk About Cutting Off My Right Arm...

I have been offline. All day!

When I called tech support (over and over throughout the day) I got a fast-busy-signal, leading me to believe that

1.) The internet provider went out of business and took my credit card number with them or

2.) The entire system is down, and all of the callers are flooding the phone system, causing the fast-busy.

What is a (part-time) housewife to do without internet?! It was a nightmare, let me tell you.

I folded laundry, (sort of) cleaned my room, and prepared whatever food 'sick' Maddie asked for. The horror!

It turns out that the fabulous 4-1-1 gave me the wrong number for the internet provider and I just needed to do a little (ahem) rebooting.

I missed you. Please don't go away again.

Saturday, December 06, 2008

Go Get 'em Tigers!

Just wanted to take a minute to wish JP and Tifferbob a fun, safe, and wonderful race tomorrow!

Thursday, December 04, 2008

To Go or Not To Go

Ummmmm... it's not an overly productive day (thank you sleepless night, the 2nd in a row).

I've puttered.

But I must say that I'd rather just sit and chat with you.

I've finished off the baked macaroni and cheese, finally removing all temptation from my refrigerator.

Maybe that obscene amount of carbs will give me a big energy boost.

Unlikely.

I think, now don't jump out of your seat, but I think that I'm going to venture out. Maybe it's time to get some wrapping paper. I've got a couple of things that could go under the tree.

The problem is, and you know how it is: wrapping paper isn't the only thing that's going to jump into my basket. I don't have a good track record lately. I'm bound to find more to go on the tree. But I need to focus more on putting things under it.

It's cheaper to just stay home. I think I will.

But then you're stuck with more of my rambling.

Special Delivery

And I don't mean that I'm expecting. Pregnant. With child.

I'm not. But thanks to my recent weight gain, last night someone at church thought that I was.

Nope. Just chubby.

No, the special delivery I'm talking about is the kind you get from the magic of Online Shopping.

Ahhhhhhh!

Yesterday the big brown truck brought me some goodies from Old Navy. And just now, when the doorbell rang, I stopped and considered my appearance (didn't want to shock the neighbors), but was certain that it would be another gift from Cyber Space. It was! Presents for me! Wallflower refills and foamy soap!

Presents on my doorstep.

Now that's just a good day right there.

Is Anyone Out There?

I just re-checked my email. As if someone else out there is awake at 1am.

I got one! From, ummm... Costco.

So Gentle, So Profound

It's absolutely, positively, really, really, really no surprise that I've put on about 10 pounds this last month. My trip to the doctor today confirmed it.

But I did so much better today, and almost went the entire day without chocolate. I even skipped Marci's beautiful brownies. (Did you hear that collective gasp? I think it came from California)

But I wussed out, and had one (really, just one) square of Isaac's Symphony Bar.

At bedtime.

And now I'm wide awake.

That's what the no soda, no caffeine lifestyle does for you.

So please indulge me so I can tell you about our wonderful Enrichment Night.

The tables were fabulous. The centerpieces were giant, clear glass vases with a bow tied around the outside, filled part-way with water with cranberries floating on the top. I thought it looked elegant.

The tables were full. We had a big turn out, over 85 sisters were there. Talking. Talking like we weren't going to talk to another grown up again. Ever.

After dinner we gathered in the Relief Society room for the sweet program.

And (finally) here's my point: our dear, sweet, wonderful, (more adjectives please) Relief Society president shared some thoughts with us, and one that really struck me was (forgive me if you've heard this before)...

We are all innkeepers. It's up to us to decide if we've got room for Christ.

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

What Would You Do?

David, sweetheart that he is (ahem), bought me a couple of tops for my birthday.

From Mervyn's.

As in: Mervyn's that is going out of business.

As in: No refunds or exchanges.

Sigh

When I was looking at the bank account, it seems that Mervyn's over charged us.

In David's usual fashion, he has long since disposed of the receipt.

So if I want to right this wrong, I have to go through the garbage, also known as Dumpster Diving.

Would you?

Would it help to know how much money we're talking about?

I am pretty sure that Mervyn's owes us about $25.

Friday is garbage day.

Again, what would you do?

Who Put That in My Chart?

Tuesdays are really hectic for us. Maddie has choir, soccer practice and activity days. Isaac has scouts. (okay, some of you are scoffing at what I call hectic)

Today we had a little extra added to the mix: I had physical therapy at 8am, and then all three of us had dentist appointments at 1pm.

I was sitting in the chair, with the dental assistant going over my allergies and conditions. Condition? Cerebral palsy. She literally asked about me having CP. I was pretty sarcastic and obnoxious when I answered "No!"

I know my posture is bad, but come on. I have loved ones with that condition, and friends with loved ones who have it. But not me.

It's in the chart. It must be true.

Not Your Average Red Neck

Oh. My. Gosh.

Apparently his surroundings are catching up with him.

I just saw footage of him leaving court dressed in a plaid shirt, overalls, and a cowboy hat.

For the record, I'm on his side.

He Didn't Cross the Road

Today I was driving in 'rural' area.

A turkey was walking down the street, past a few houses, obeying all the pedestrian rules.

We made eye contact. He seemed to say "Ha! I wasn't the centerpiece on your table last Thursday. What are you going to do about it?"

Just Between You and I

When I'm home alone (ahhhh), or as we say in our family: Home A-yone, I leave the TV on as I putter around the house. Sometimes I even crank up the volume so that I can listen from all corners of the house.

I don't watch any one show regularly. Just whatever. Could be The Cosby Show. Gilmore Girls, or The View.

But today I needed my show to not be too deep. (Shhhh!) That's when I turn to my friends:

PS One day I will have a dog just like Meaty.

The Outing

You are going to be so sick of me by day's end. There are just too many things randomly swirling around my noggin.

I've been a part-time-stay-at-home-mom for a few months now. I thoroughly love it.

But sometimes, like today, I feel like I'm treading on someone else's turf. (yes I know 'else's' isn't a word)

I. Got. To. Go. To. Robert's. Alone.

It was 9:30. There were some shoppers, but not shoulder to shoulder like it often is. The paranoid side of me thought that the others were giving me funny looks. Like I didn't genuinely belong there. Like I'm not a full-blooded home-maker. Like they knew.

I still enjoyed it. Too much. $$$

Maybe next time I'll do it right and take some Bon Bons or Haagen Daaz with me.

PS For the Californians, Robert's is like Michael's, but smaller and better.

Monday, December 01, 2008

Are You Holding Out On Me?

I just typed a blog about my feelings towards my high school students. Some really good, some not so much. I will go so far to say that I compared some to Granzella's bread and others to icky bologna.

But then I chickened out. It seems that I am censoring my blogs more and more. Last week my friend told me that she un-published several posts for fear that her parents might get offended.

Several times I've entertained the thought of starting an anonymous blog.

Are you finding that you're holding back?

Or do you already have your secret blog?